So I’m facing my fears again. Why? Because I’m about to take some actions and fears are here again…. So, what do we do? Feel the fear and do it anyway, right? No point pretending that they are not here, they are…. But it’s really only my thinking about it that makes it so scary, not the reality. So, I’m taking a piece of paper and start writing all fears and concerns that I have. Pretty soon I notice the little voice inside of me that starts to make comments, and I start writing it down, and pay attention – because this little voice that I could hardly hear because off all those thoughts – is actually right.
So, I’m scared of or worried about
– reaching people
– how would I look
– can I even do it?
– It’s so new, it’s out of my comfort zone
– What if people wouldn’t show up? – It’s nonsense, of course they will.
– But what if they stop coming – so what, then you are no worse than you are now
– I’ll have to be the leader – but inside you already are a leader
– What id I’ll make mistakes – the sooner the better. You need to learn, so you can go after your goals, so you can live the life of your dreams. Make them, the more the better – the faster you’ll learn. If you never try, you’ll never make any mistakes and you will never learn. You’ll stagnate. Believe me, it’s much better than making mistakes
– What if I’ll stutter – and????
– I’ll have to have the guts and be who I always wanted to be – but honey, you already are all you wanted to be. You couldn’t’ even want it if it wasn’t in you already. It’s all here. Just do it
So, the more I write, the more I relax and start smiling and believing in myself again. And if it’s not good enough, I can always do the work. What’s the work? The beautiful method developed by Katie Byron – please read her book “Loving what is”. It’s a wonderful book describing how to achieve freedom through the process of self discovery. Trying to let go of painful thoughts never work, but by going through “the work”, the thoughts would let go of us. It’s not the problem that causes our suffering; it’s our thinking about the problem.
Anyway, that’s it for today. I do feel a lot better. And don’t forget, the more you do it, the easier it gets. Something that is hard and scary today will be easy and effortless in a month or two – but only if you do it. If you don’t – it’s still going to be hard and scary.